There is a tiny part of me that can’t actually believe that LittleTDJ turns 5 years old today. I’ve been accepting and rejecting this for the last couple of weeks. Five years old. A milestone of a birthday. His birthday makes me reflect upon a time when MrTDJ and I didn’t think that we could have children. It makes me smile and giggle about the shocking day that my doctor and I learned of LittleTDJ. In less than an hour, a routine doctor’s appointment to discuss my inability to conceive turned into me seeing the first heartbeat of our already 14 week old baby.
My eyes water and my nose tingles at the memory of my husband rubbing my pregnant belly while we tossed around names that were horrible compound words using our first and middle names. My pregnancy was an amazing time. I felt like the most beautiful woman on the planet and my husband reminded me daily that indeed I was. We had so many ideas, dreams, fears and plans for the little boy we would bring to this world. Our precious boy roared to life on January 13, 2009 at 11:03am. The lyrics to a Yolanda Adam song pop into my head, “You’re my little darling child, seeing you makes me smile, God Bless the day he sent my little angel to me.”
And an angel he is. Our son has shared his light, his love and his laugh with everyone he has encountered for the last five years and it has been amazing and enlightening. As a part of his autism spectrum disorder, there was a time were MrTDJ and I were worried that LittleTDJ would never speak. Even typing that sentence makes me howl with laughter. When MrTDJ passed away, our son was barely verbal. Today? I don’t know where he gets the energy to talk as much as he does. He is special is so many ways that I can’t describe because typing through tears is tough.
There is a part of me that remain angry that my husband is not here, but I continue to work thorugh those emotions. Our baby boy is growing and thriving because of God’s grace and mercy. He is sustained in ways that I didn’t think possible. I hope and pray that my husband is smiling upon the beautifully complex child that we created. Rest well MrTDJ because our son surely, surely carries you in every fiber of his being. Happy birthday my little prince!
Happy Birthday to your little man! Doesn’t it blow your mind how FAST they are growing up?
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to your special little guy! He will shine, autism won’t define him, it will make him shine. I know…
Happy Birthday to little man -I still think Antinette would have made a wonderful name -LOL {[huggs}}
Happy Birthday to your big boy! The years do fly by. I hope he has a wonderful day!
Happy Birthday, little man!
Happy birthday Little TDJ! Wishing him many, many more to come.
Happy birthday, Little TDJ!!!!
And lol at the talking – my oldest daughter was born with 45% hearing loss in both ears, we never thought she’d really be able to speak, now there are times when I wish speech therapy hadn’t worked quite so well. I kid. I love her but the talking…. Oh. My. Word.
That was touching; may he have a wonderful birthday and may love blossom on this day.
Words cannot describe how much joy you and Little TDJ have brought into my life. I am a better person and will be a better mom because of you both. Happy Birthday MJ! Auntie loves you much!
Happy Birthday Little!
Happy birthday lil TDJ. Love you both!
FIve? Wow! Happy birthday to the Little Handsome one! God bless you both! 🙂
Happy birthday Little TDJ! Such a handsome boy and what a miracle he is!
Happy belated birthday to Lil TDJ. I hope he had a good day.
Happy belated birthday to both of you (his being born, your bearing him). I think of you so often, Taya, and I know your boy is thriving, even as you continue to miss husband and daddy. Five is such a big boy.
Happy Belated Birthday to him!
Happy belated birthday to your little guy! I thought of you in the midst of writing something about #LTYMDC and wanted to stop by to give birthday wishes and a virtual hug. I hope you are well! 🙂
Such sweet words for your little man on his 5th birthday! Such sweet memories you are able to replay whenever you like of the joy your and your husband felt! God sure does make us laugh sometimes…at the appointment just to find out you were already pregnant! My husband and I are trying to get pregnant and it hasn’t happened yet. I would love to get a surprise like the one you had that day! Blessings, Taya!
OMG!!! This just made me well up in tears. First of all Happy Belated Bday to your son. My son was diagnosed at 2.9 and now he’s 14 and I’m like what’s autism. Nobody seems to see it except me. I’m so very very sure your husband who is now both of your guardian angel, is helping you along the way. You visited my Instagram page so I wanted to say hi and check out your blog.